The Weapon of Irreverence
What do you do when someone you look up to fails you? What do you do when you admire teachers, mentors, whatever that label is and then see them screw up? I’ve grappled with these ideas of mentors who are experts in their craft and have contributed to my growth but have sides to them that are dark and dangerous.
Looking back there have been quite a few examples. Our film studies professor back in college was absolutely brilliant in breaking down the dialectics of Soviet Cinema, especially Eisenstein’s films.
“The Cossacks marching towards the crowd — cut to — a close up of a woman wearing a pince-nez — cut to — a soldier raising his baton…”
He would move around the class animatedly and we would all listen to him with rapt attention. The class conflict in 1920’s Russia and the rise of a new language in cinema had never seemed more fascinating!
However, the image of the man came crashing down very soon. Back then the Singur-Nandigram crisis was going on and anti-government protests were taking place everywhere in Calcutta. He walked into the class one day, looking very agitated and justifying the brutal killings by the Left-front Government he said, “Land has to be taken!” That day I realized that this man perhaps only saw class conflict on celluloid and never around him.
Similar to this professor, there have been other teachers too who would be charming and brilliant in their articulation, analysis and control over their craft. A communication studies professor fluent in the theories of Lacan and Foucault, during a typical nature-nurture debate would say that it’s the parents and a dysfunctional family that are to be blamed if a child turned out to be ‘homosexual’ with ‘deviant sexual fantasies’.
Another teacher from school who helped me prepare ‘Mark Antony’s Funeral Speech’ from Julius Caesar for an elocution contest is now seen banging utensils from her balcony and putting up ‘intellectuals are anti-nationals’ posts on social media.
Another professor who may have been bullied in their childhood due to their non-confirming gender behaviour showed deep-seated hatred towards a minority community, to the extent that they labelled the post-Godhra riots as ‘cleaning-up’ of the ‘antisocial elements’. I couldn’t solve this puzzle in my head — how can you be in the thick of things yet perpetrate the same viciousness?
Over the years, looking at them and their contradictions I’ve realized that there was a problem with my own outlook. We’ve been conditioned to idolize our teachers and accept them as upright, strong, superior beings whose ideologies and actions are to be emulated without questioning. And that’s messed up! It’s unreasonable to expect them to align with the ‘image’ that we have of them just because they are teachers. It was never their job in the first place. They can be cynical, jealous, insecure and ignorant and that’s fine! I’ve tried to resolve the contradictions by not putting them on a pedestal of virtue anymore and look at them as individuals who are flawed.
At a personal level, I have also decided to not dismiss their contributions and be forever grateful for those acts of kindness, for instilling confidence in me, realizing my true potential and encouraging me to better my craft and shaping my vision towards a few things. That’s about it. I don’t need to force myself to respect them for their ideologies and world view.
Thankfully, the world has opened up and we don’t need to limit ourselves to traditional ways of learning to gain knowledge or seek inspiration from. I’ve learnt so much and been inspired by young artists and activists in the recent past. What I love most about them is that they call a spade a spade. They’ll appreciate and encourage you for the good you put out and call you out for the bullshit. They are irreverent! In today’s world where everyone is bowing down before their undisputed leaders, that’s the weapon we need the most. The weapon of irreverence.
